Big Fat One-Eyed Crippled Black Belt Runs Off Intruders

by Kim Barrington

At 12:45 am Friday morning, two male intruders broke down the door to my home in Springfield, Illinois.  Earlier, I had gone into the other bedroom to lay down and watch a DVD. Trish yelled from the other room that someone had pulled into the driveway and was coming to the door. Before I could make it to the door, Trish had already opened it. The person asked if a "John" lived here. Trish told him he had the wrong house, and closed the door.  We thought this was suspicious.                       

The intruders thought Trish was home alone, because suddenly they kicked in the front door.  I had returned to the other room by this time. The larger of the two was stunned when he realized I was home and did everything he could to get out of there. I was about to grab him and hit him with a right punch, when I tripped over a box at the end of the bed.  They both shot out the door and were last seen running east as fast as they could.